I know this has been asked on more than one occasion, but I’ll ask it again, even though I already know the answer. Why the heck do female video game and movie characters always have to wear the most stupid, unrealistic costumes into battle? It’s ridiculous. I don’t see men leaping into war in Speedos. They wear armor/chain mail/bullet proof vests/etc. Oh sure, there are some exceptions. For example, one of the (many!) reasons that I loved the movie Thor was because of the character Sif. (Okay, so the main reason I loved it was because of Loki, but come on, I’m a fangirl – what do you want?)
Sif was awesome for many reasons. She was a killer fighter. She was loyal to her friends. She had realistic armor. And she was still gorgeous. (I’m rather jealous, actually. I really wish I had her hair.) THIS is what femme fatales and other warrior women should be wearing when they go to beat the snot out of someone.
Brother recently started getting into the Devil May Cry games. He knew it would be something I would love to watch, so he began playing what I think is number four in the series the last time we got together for a video game night. Epic scenery despite being an older game, awesome battle moves, and the main storyline is pretty cool. Plus the characters are beautiful and intriguing. (DISCLAIMER: This game isn’t for the faint of heart. Lots of blood, creepy creatures and nightmare-inducing clown-scarecrows. *shudder* It’s rated “M” for a reason. Ye be warned.)
Nevertheless, we’re playing along, enjoying the story and kicking butt along the way. Brother hadn’t played very far into it before, so he’s also enjoying figuring out where to go and what to find, that sort of thing.
Cue the other reason it’s rated “M” with gratuitous scantily-clad bendy Skank Woman who doesn’t believe in wearing underwear. Brother’s jaw dropped and he quickly apologized, making sure to reiterate that he hadn’t seen this part of the game before. Uh-huh. Sure he hadn’t. Naturally, Mom chose that precise moment to walk in and see how we were doing, as she often does. I’m pretty sure that Brother would have rather fallen into a pit of venomous snakes while listening to Miley Cyrus on repeat for eternity than be there with the two of us. We all observed as Skank Woman – having finished disposing of some evil creatures in a rather disturbing manner – saunters over to the main character, jutting her chest out of her snippet of a costume as far as she can.
Not missing a beat, Mom quipped, “Well gee, that’s how I look every morning. Don’t you think?”
“Absolutely,” I replied. “In fact, I was just sitting back here thinking that I need to buy me one of those outfits for work.”
Mortified, Brother kept rapidly hitting buttons in the attempt to figure out how to skip ahead on the game. “OMG KILL ME NOW.”
It just goes to show that tormenting siblings is something that truly never gets old. It also goes to show that we have the coolest mother in the world. But my original question still stands: What gives? Nero’s character is appropriately clad to kill these things. Don’t me wrong, Skank Woman got the job done, too. She just made it look rather…um, dirty. Kind of like Ivy in Soul Caliber.
So come on, video game and movie producers. Don’t completely forget about your female fanbase. Give us more characters like Sif to aspire to, cosplay-wise. Heck, for that matter just give us more movies like Thor in general. Trust me, the world would be a better place.